It’s no secret that by increasing your sexual intimacy with your partner, you can boost your overall well-being. Physical intimacy affects not only your mental, physical and emotional health but also your self-confidence and happiness. And that’s what we’re here to address.
We’re going to teach you how to sustain the excitement, put sex back on the table, and maybe even and some spice in your love life.
Why Physical Intimacy Is Important
- Physical signs of affection such as hugs and kisses can boost your mental health. Touch therapy states that such actions help reduce stress and depression.
- During sex, the brain releases dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin, which are all neurotransmitters that boost feelings of happiness and relaxation.
- Sexual intimacy improves blood circulation, reduces bloating, flushes the lymphatic system and strengthens the immune system.
- Just as good as exercise, sexual intimacy gets your heart rate up and utilises all the large muscle groups.
- It has a calming effect on the nervous system, helping you sleep better by driving away mental chatter and physical tension.
- Physical touch transmits a sense of being understood, accepted and cared for. It enhances your relationship with your partner on an emotional level.
10 Tips To Get Your Sex Life Back On Track
1. Know Your Body
It is evident that if you know what brings you pleasure, you can share this insight with your partner. While we impart traditions like doodh ka glass and tease women endlessly about their ‘first night’ as a married woman, we don’t discuss self-pleasure. Even in sex education classes, boys are told that it’s natural to masturbate and girls are told that sex can result in unwanted pregnancies.
The reason we avoid talking about masturbation with women is that it would mean accepting that women have sexual desires and needs, just like men do. So women, whether you’re single or in a relationship, it is crucial to learn the pleasure points of your own body and learn to touch yourself. Make it a priority to experiment on your own in order to find out what works for you. Then, share this insight with your partner while you’re making love to take things to the next level.
AOI Female Masturbation Survey revealed that a third of the women said that they masturbated every day, and another third said twice a week. 16% said three to four times a week.
2. Enthusiasm Is Key
Getting into a sexual slump is common with couples who have been together for a long time. Your libido or sex drive is affected by several things like stress, physical pain, changes in sleep patterns and so much more. Passion, alone, can’t sustain sexual intimacy unless both the partners are willing to try new things.
Based on your comfort level, you can do a variety of things like indulging in dirty talk, sending nudes, watching an X-rated movie while having sex, role-playing, adding toys or props to the mix, or even performing a striptease for your partner. Shed the inhibitions and push the envelope.
3. Communicate Openly
Indian women are still shy when it comes to discussing their sex life, even with their partners. The best way to resolve problems or issues in a relationship, be it inside or outside the bedroom, is through open communication.
Having a respectful and honest conversation about what you like or dislike, how and where you want to be touched and what turns you on is key. Games like naughty dice and cards can be great conversation starters. Also, don’t be afraid to point out if there’s a lull in your sex life. The longer things are ignored, the harder it will be to put sex back on the table.
4. Don’t Go On A Loop
When couples have been together for long, they often end up in a ‘sex routine’. Same positions, the same order of pleasuring, and almost a robotic way of getting to the finish line.
Monotony is one of the biggest reasons for reduced sexual pleasure. You must make the effort to change things up, and enjoy the foreplay and post-coital intimacy equally.
5. Don’t Let Myths Intimidate You
Common myths like penis and breast size, the ideal appearance of the vulva for women, or body hair for men can take the fun out of physical intimacy and induce stress and anxiety.
Sexual pleasure is highly diminished when a person is self-conscious or does not feel good enough. Don’t let your insecurities get the better of you. Confidence is a huge turn on for any partner and celebrating your body and uniqueness is key to moving past the superficial phase of sex.
6. Prevent Painful Sex
Extending foreplay and use of lubricants are some ways to prevent painful sex. With long and focused foreplay, natural vaginal lubrication makes sex smooth and pain-free. It also reduces foreskin friction. There are plenty of solutions available in the market and you should be open-minded about using them.
Some women experience painful sex due to lack of communication or mental blockages. So connect with your partner or seek help from a therapist if required. If you or your partner experience painful sex often, it is advisable to consult a health professional.
7. Make A List
The point of this list is to understand what you want, will, and won’t try in terms of your sex life. This makes it easier to communicate with your partner about what you want from the act of sex, what you are willing to try and what is off-limits.
A Want, Will, Won’t list helps you communicate with your partner effectively and addresses compatibility. For instance, your Want list can include using protection, peeing before and after sex and much more.
8. Maintain A Healthy Daily Routine
Hitting the snooze button in the morning and staying up into the wee hours could be killing your libido. Experts suggest that getting enough sleep can boost a woman’s sex drive. It’s easy to understand how being exhausted can put a damper on romantic activities.
Similarly, exercising regularly increases your stamina, strength, and flexibility during sex, making sex less physically challenging and more fun. So hit the gym or the yoga mat to have a better time when you hit the sheets.
9. Schedule Some Bedroom Fun
With deadlines, household chores and kids running amock, sex can get pushed further down the list. But sometimes, you need to choose sex over doing the dishes.
Make sexual intimacy a priority and invest some time into it. A weekend set aside just for the two of you or tweaking your schedule to accommodate some romance can be beneficial. By making your relationship and sex a priority, you really are investing in yourself.
10. Keep The Spark Alive
What happens outside the bedroom, affects what goes on inside it. No matter how great your sex life may seem, problems in relationships eventually hamper your physical connection.
Being emotionally connected with your partner is vital for physical intimacy. Set some time aside to discuss issues at work, home or even in your relationships. If you think some problems can’t be sorted at home, take the help of a therapist or counsellor. A couples therapist will help you talk through your feelings around sex and make a plan to get things back on track.
5 Products To Boost Sexual Wellness
1. Condoms
One of the safest ways to avoid the transmission of STIs as well as to significantly diminish the chances of an unwanted pregnancy is to use condoms. With a variety of condoms available in the market to suit your every need, you can indulge in pleasure without a worry.
From brands like Durex, Kohinoor and Kama Sutra to types like Extra Thin, Dotted and Ribbed, Nykaa offers a range of condoms.
2. Lubricants
Using lubricants should be natural, not awkward. They make physical intimacy a lot more easy and fun and eliminate painful sex. Make the most of lubes and upgrade your sex life.
That’s Personal has a variety of lubricants like water-based, silicone-based, flavoured and even sachets. They even have a Corona sale happening right now!
3. Books
Want to learn more about your body and sexual intimacy? Then get some books online or download the audio versions for privacy. Knowledge comes in all forms and the curiosity to know more can be beneficial in the bedroom.
Get a range of books from Shycart about relationships, sex education and even Kamasutra!
4. Sexual Enhancers
Products that improve your sex life are not just limited to condoms and lubes. Sexual enhancers address physical problems and improve performance.
Get a variety of enhancers like Shilajit, arousal creams and Ayurvedic products at Nykaa.
5. Oils & Lotions
Setting the mood right is no more a task with some fun massage oils and lotions for you and your partner. Light some candles, put on soothing music and give your partner the gist of a sensual massage.
Try the wine flavoured warming oil or the exotic massage gel from That’s Personal.